Mmmm Moxie's

I hate hot waiters.

You know when you go to Moxie's, order an appetizer, a "Moxie-sized" Peach Bellini, supper, and then have dessert, and while you know you're being a pig by eating a weeks worth of calories in a week, you don't want to be judged by the waiter you're pretty sure used to be an actor on Bold and the Beautiful.

Want the half order? No, the full order... Would you like the sample size? No, the full size... And I would like another refill.

I hate hot waiters, I hate thinking about what they are thinking while they check on me "to see if everything's ok" and I have a mouthful of food. Yeah, I have a mouthful of food, where else do think I would put food. You'd really be judging me if I was eating it through my ears.

I hate wondering if they are betting with the other waiters if I can really eat it all. I hate hot waiters and how they smile with their hotness for a good tip and how they smell almost as good as the food.

I feel like I should eat half my burger and take the other half home... and by home, I mean eating it in the car in the parking lot.

Dear Moxie's, I'd like you to hire an ugly waiter, with acne scars, bald spots, yellow crooked teeth and twenty five extra pounds. Thanks, Jen