Where do you find a decent guy?

Okay, I have been trying to find a decent guy for awhile. I haven't been trying too hard either since I'm still fairly traumatized from my last relationship.

So, I figure I'm a decent chick. I'm not crazy, I'm not obsessive, I'm not going to ask you to run off and get married after a second date, I don't have harmful addictions, and if it doesn't work out, you won't have to move or change your phone number.

Where would I meet me?? At home, most likely. It's too cold to really leave the house. Shit, this poses a problem for me.

So, I'm starting to think, that in order to meet a decent guy, I'm going to have to go door to door searching.

"Hi, I'm Jennifer, is there any decent single guys here?"

Mr. Cranky, Please Let Me Sleep

This morning my Mom got a phone call from Mr. Cranky, our next door neighbour. It was early and she didn't answer. But unfortunately, he lives next door, he can see we're home. So he calls again, and again, Mom doesn't answer. Then, thanks to living in a small town, my grandpa calls. Mr. Cranky has phoned him! So, by 9:45, Mr. Cranky is knocking on our door. He wants me to move my car, which is parked infront of his house, because over Christmas with all the company, there was no where else to park. It's -30, it probably won't start. And, being the genius I am, I was right.

As I'm giving up to go crawl back in to the warm bed I had to vacate to have peace in our house, Mr. Cranky comes over. Apparently, he has called the city. He complained that our street needs to be cleaned and all the other ones have been, so ours should too. I hate to break it to you old timer, our street was first, we live very close to the hospital and get priority. You can see on the sides of the street, the piled up snow. At this point I'm not even sure what the City will do, the street is fine, drive by to please him??.

So, I go into the house and get Mom out of bed too. I had a plan. I always have a plan!! She was pleased when I told her "We're gonna push". And that's what we did, while people across the street sat in their SUV and watched. I wanted to give them the finger, stupid a$$ holes. Sit there and watch. So with alot of effort and a few jokes we pushed my car infront of Mom's house because really that makes all difference.

Now it's 10:30am, I have frostbite, I am bitchy and can't get back to sleep.

Merry Christmas, Love Jordan

My favorite present this year was not a new gift at all. Jennifer found the old Jordan Knight doll in storage and wrapped it up for me! OMG ... I laughed. I cried. It was so funny because I loved it so much, and it was back!! And the note was priceless. You can't buy gifts like this.

"Angela, you are beautiful and took my breath away at Chapters. Lets meet under the mistletoe so I can make the rest of your dreams come true. Love Jordan."
This is his original outfit too. I don't know why I never put Ken's clothes on him. Sacrilegious I guess. Upon closer inspection, it appears his pants don't come off. This may explain why it looks like his crotch was cut open and re-stitched. Maybe I had to check out the goods. I am not afraid to do it again either.

Jennifer tells me when she played with it, the Jordan doll had special status and got to kiss all the cute Barbies. I think what Jordan needs now is a Barbie of ME!

We Have A Brother

He doesn't get his name in the title of our blog, but Ange and Jen do have a brother. As you can see from this photo, he gets a bit overwhelmed by the variety of towels available to him when we're all home for the holidays. So, Jen made him this sign to help him out. She was tired of him always using HER towel!

2009 Tour?

Dear NKOTB fans:Happy Holidays from New Kids on the Block! Stay tuned for BIG announcements to come top of 2009! You won’t want to miss your opportunity for more FACE TIME!!!!*** SAVE THE DATE MAY 15 – 18, 2009 ***

So, this was the message on the New Kids blog that I have been reading. Looks like another tour is in the works!

Yay!!

2009 looks good so far ... I will turn 31, I will get my degree, and I will go to another New Kids show!! Who knows who I will meet at Chapters this time ... Joey would be good ...

Jen's Wonderful Chocolate Cheese Ball!

This is one of my favorite things to make, so I thought I would share.

Okay: so first of all you need to get those Christmas tunes going, I suggest All I want for Christmas by Mariah Carey, or Please Come Home for Christmas by Bon Jovi, but if all you have is Kenny Rogers and Dolly Parton, that'll work too.

Now, you'll need : 1/2 cup butter (not marg.), 1 package cream cheese. Grab a bowl and mix them together while shaking what your mama gave ya! For those multi taskers this can count as exercise too! If you have bells, attach them to your apron strings and you can feel like a belly dancer and jingle! Wear the apron, you'll need it!

Once that's well blended, grab 3/4 cup icing sugar, 2 tbsp brown sugar, 1/2 tsp vanilla, and 1 tbsp cocoa. Throw that all in there, now, if you're like me you'll spill icing ugar all over the black outfit you're wearing, so grab the bag and just shake some more in.

While your stirring this, make sure you stop to sing along to your Christmas music and try to hit those high notes! Be sure not to spit in the chocolate cheese ball unless you want to have a reason to keep it for yourself.

Now once this looks consistent, add 1/3-1/2 cup chocolate chips (I use chipits milk chocolate because they taste like a candy bar) so shove a handful in your mouth, your family will be thankful it's stopped the singing! If you want to mix it up, use some dark or white chocolate chips too!

Now, I used a 1/3 cup pecans too, because those are my favorite, but you can change that if you want. I'm not gonna tell you that's wrong! Take this opportunity to express yourself. Be Nutty! (I'm so lame). You can eye ball this too. It's got sugar, butter and cream cheese, there is no way to make this not taste good.

Now, dance your way over to the fridge and chill for like a half hour. I put it in a bowl because I'm a rebel and I have no idea how to get things in a ball shape. But I bet you could google that and find out. Or get some ball rolling porn tips! Haha. (Now I'm a perv too)

Serve with Christies Crispy Thin Chocolate Wafers, I don't know if that's the actual name, but if I ran the company that's what I'd call them.

Easy, heh?? Just think of the praise you'll get for your fine culinary skills, maybe you're dancing and singing too!

Hope that put a smile on your face!

Have a great holiday season! Jen

Rampant Stupidity is the Plague of our Times

I ranted to Jen tonight on the phone.
Hardly unusual.

I told her I am sick of stupidity. It's everywhere. Like the plague. It's the plague of our times.

I am sick of people who do stupid things.
I am sick of smart people who I love dearly making stupid choices.

Why?

Can't people see that they are doing things that just don't make any damn sense?
Am I the only one concerned about making sense?
Am I the problem?

Because I love my family, I'm not naming names here, but lately, the list of people who are making my f*ing head spin with their idiocracy is mind-boggling. And it ain't just family.

Grant says maybe I am turning into him.
Heather says her husband would just say "You're all f*ing stupid ... we're out of here."

I think her husband is right.

Edmonton Journal

http://communities.canada.com/edmontonjournal/blogs/pluggedin/archive/2008/11/18/step-by-step-to-starbucks.aspx?CommentPosted=true#commentmessage

I made the Edmonton Journal! This is like the time I wrote to the Calgary Herald in 1990 defending what a great group they were! Too funny.

One Month Anniversary

A mere month ago, I came across a dark-haired handsome man in a nearly empty bookstore.

To him, I was a stranger. But to me, he was the familiar face I had seen in a million posters, in a million videos and dreamt about kissing a million and one times. He ... as you know ... was Jordan Knight.

Like people remember 9/11 or JFK's assasination or the first steps on the moon, I will remember my chance meeting with Jordan Knight.

When I think of Chapters, I will think of you.
When I think of Ted Turner, I will think of you.
When I read biographies, I will think of you.
When I drink Starbucks, I will think of you.
When I die, I want to be buried in my New Kids pyjamas.

I also learned today that there are plans for an '09 tour. March and April secondary market US arena tour, and in May thru July, a national market US Shed/Arena tour. I'm not sure what "shed" means, but here's to hoping it means Regina's Brandt Center.

~Ange

The Grammar Police.

I have bad grammar. My philosophy prof told me my essay stunk. You know what. He didn't see it before! He has no idea. Right Ange?

So Angela, as my sister, one our your duties is to be the grammar police, which doesn't have any benefits or pay. And the best part is, if you don't like it, you really have no choice, you'll be obligated from guilt. Who else will do it ? There's just you.

Although, since I frequently say "me and person's name" instead of "someone's name and I", I won't judge you either if you ever mistake.

My favorite it is and will always be "tooken". I feel like it really should be a word. And Mistooken. Tooken is just a good word.

Where did my rubber boots go at Craven? They were tooken.

What Else? Another Concert Photo

I hate to leave my blog on a sour note, so I will add this photo in to make me feel better.

Jen Can't Keep Her Pants On!

As far as sisters go, especially considering our seven year age gap, Angela and I are as close as sisters can be. I have often said Ange is the only person on the face of the earth I don't fight with. Maybe it was because we got the fighting out of our systems early! So, I visit Angela in the city quite often.

This past July I quit my job (since I didn't need it anymore, I was going back to school). The first week I had off, I immediately headed to Regina so Angela and I could spend some time together. Grant is a great husband for Ange because he lets us mostly do whatever we want, and stays our of hair. So, of course, coming from a small town I was in desperate need of shopping. I

I believe it was a Monday when we went into Reitmans. It's one of Ange's favorite stores, and I don't mind it either. Well, I used to not mind it. Shopping with Ange is an acquired taste. Not only is Ange is the Queen of Returns, she'll find something she likes and then we have to travel to 3 other stores to find it in the right size or color. So, I had tried on a few items and was out of the dressing room with no luck, only to find Ange still looking and with an arm load.

While she was trying on clothes, I was becoming impatient and my feet were getting sore, so I sat down on this padded blue velvet stool in the dressing room next to her. A moment later, I could feel something, I wasn't sure if it was cold or wet, or what was going on. I stood up, and looked behind myself in the mirror only to see a big wet spot on the upper thigh of my pant leg. Being brave, I touched it, them smelled my fingers. It was pee.

I had sat in pee.

I tell Ange, who tells me to go into the bathroom and wash my hands, which I did. She was only half done trying on her clothes, so I took the keys and headed back to Fannie (Angela's car's nickname). I had my pants off before I had even opened the door. So I sat in Ange's car and waited for her to finish shopping. It seemed like an eternity for her to get there, but when she did, we left for home.

On the way, she thought she better phone Grant to make sure he didn't have any friends over and to make sure the coast was clear. We get back to Angela's, and I feel like I should mention her house is directly across the street from a church. I'm in the car with no pants on and waiting to make sure no one is outside so I can make a run for the door. Once inside, I showered, and washed my pants. Before you know it, we were good to go again.

Little did we know, this wouldn't be the only time I ended up pantless in Ange's car that week.

Every year Angela and I attend the Craven Country Jamboree. We had skipped out of Thursday that year since my best friend Krista was going to be showing up the next day, we were going to wait for her. And the Kick off Act, was one that Angela despises. It was not good weather, it was rainy. I should explain Craven is also in a valley that doesn't absorb the rain very well and the mud turns into chocolate milk shake mud thats ankle deep.

Friday, we got out there, and I had left my rubber boots in the tent we had set up a few days earlier. So I was completely angry and shocked, when I went to the tent to get them, and they had been stolen. Of course, someone else needed rubber boots in the nightmare mud! So, only having a pair of white flip flops which would by the end of the day turn brown and when they flipped and flopped threw mud up my backside, Angela, Krista and I went to see the show. Pam Tillis and Sara Evans were both there that night and incredible.

After the shows, we walked back to the car, in the nightmare mud, which is now slippery than ever and there is cars and trucks driving down the muddy roads we needed to walk on. We were a fair ways from the gate, so when we got to the porta potties (one of the landmarks), I knew we were only a few hundred feet away. I could see Fannie, and as Krista put it best, "If hell is cold, we were in it". There was a car on my left side and the gross porta potties on my left, and as I rounded the corner on the homestretch to the car, I wiped out.

I fell into the nightmare mud, I was down on my hands and knees in the mud as thousands of people walked by.

Needless to say, there was no way I'd be able to get into Grant's pristine, detailed, well maintained car with mud all over me. We used the water we had left from our water bottle to clean bits of me off, then used our $0.75 ponchos to wrap up the muddy footwear and my pants. So, I'm standing in our campsite at Craven, pantless, waiting for an arrangement of rags to cover the seat so I could have a ride back to Regina. It was nice to get to Regina, while Ange went into the house to warn Grant about the mud and my partial nudity, Krista took me out back so she could use the garden hose to clean me off.

So it appears, I just can't seem to keep my pants on!!

~ Jennifer

http://link.brightcove.com/services/link/bcpid1214149050/bctid1815616927

Found a new website with lots of videos I haven't seen. I love this one because it's Jordan and Joey only ... nkotb.ca - for all us Canadians!!

~Ange

PS. Jen still hasn't told me whether she can get the security video or not...

PPS. I am not listening to the New Kids right now. I am listening to Miranda Lambert instead. Feels kinda wrong...

50 Most Beautiful People 1990

http://www.people.com/people/archive/article/0,,20063265,00.html

I remember this. I probably kissed it good night.

Addictions

Angela has what is becoming an addiction to the New Kids. Now, since I've taken half a psychology class, I feel like I can accurately see the situation. Angela was a die hard NKOTB fan during the early 1990's. She even once wrote into the newspaper to tell them she'd always love them and it wasn't just a fad. Angela's NKOTB obsession eventually became extinct. Extinction is a common occurence, it's the progressive weakening of a response because of non presentation of the stimulus. So, she still has the neural pathways in her brain to love NKOTB, but their absence caused these pathways to go unused for many years. When she heard that NKOTB were back, it sparked spontaneous recovery. The process of which those pathways become used again. It's the re-emergence of a response after it had previously been extinguished.

So, this is my theory why, that in only a month, Angela has become all consumed again. She has begun to exhibit tween like behavior, she spending too much money on them, spending all her extra time researching them, watching youtube videos. As an adult a tween obsession is dangerous, she's not going to spend all her babysitting money on tickets, she's going to spend her government money $$$ on flying around the world to stalk them. In serious stages this can lead to marriage breakdown, bankruptcy, job loss, alientation of those around her.

Just last week, I told her I was going to Nickelback and she accused me of cheating with other boy bands. Now, I'm not sure how that's cheating. I haven't slept with any of them. I'm not saying I wouldn't. Especially since I would, I'd let any of them preggo my eggo, that's a meal ticket for 18 years! Anyway, my point is Angela is starting to get out of hand. Which she can slightly admit to. So maybe that's the first step to her healing.

However, she isn't completely innocent. I am her enabler. I enable! I have my own addictions, I went to Africa for 3 weeks and couldn't go a day without Perez Hilton or Facebook, so I understand how important a role as an enabler is. With that being said, I am happy to enable my sister and be her partner in crime. When she asks me how much tickets to London are, I will find a good deal! When she starts a blog, I will contribute. When she finds out tickets to the NKOTB after party were only $5 and we didn't know, I will be angry and blame someone else along side her!

Don't Tell Me It's Only $700 To Fly To London

Jen phoned me today to inform me that going to London to see a second New Kids show was cheap - only $700. There and back.

I started imagining all the ways Grant might try to kill me if I told him we were going to London to see a New Kids concert with 5 Star Access ($375 US).
Strangulation?
Starvation?
Dissolving pills into PC brand no-caffeine no-calorie cola and making me drink it?

I told her if Grant got a job soon, I'd think about it.

Someone needs to tell me I'm insane because I used to be someone who prided themselves on rationality and practicality. Now I've become addicted once again to a boy band...17 years later!
Yesterday she informed me that I was suffering from regression and that I was going back to my "tween" years.

Who's suffering? If I have regression, I think I'm enjoying it.
~Ange

It's Occured To Me That Chapters May Have a Security Video of me and Jordan

Okay, as you can tell by the plethora of posts, I have alot of venting to do.

The fact that I don't have a photo or autograph of Jordan from our chance encounter has kept me up at night.

It occured to me that Chapters will certainly have video security footage and I have also wondered if they would phone the RCMP if I called and asked to see it.

I can only relive the moment in my mind.

** I had an RCMP room mate once. I'll email see what I can do.** Jen

Whether I'm 12 or 30; and whether Jordan's 20 or 38, he's hot. And has dimples.

Photo courtesy of Lauren Neilsen. I did not have seats this good.

Jordan: Our all time favorite.

I feel like a portion of this blog needs to be dedicated to Jordan Knight. And that it should be expressed how much I love him. I love him A LOT.

Jordan was always my favorite. And Ange's too. She had his doll, which I eventually inherited. It is now in a bag with two barbies, in a box packed away safely in my mom's basement. And the Jordan doll still has the little braided pony tail at the back. I remember once Angela freaking out because she thought he had it cut off. She watched and rewound a video for hours. I'm still laughing at the image of Angela sitting cross legged on the floor inches away from the tv screen while my Dad tried to reason with her, telling her it was probably in his shirt. She loved Jordan Knight.

So, while we were shopping the day before the big NKOTB concert (which I should add, I didn't really want to go to, but Ange pointed out if I didn't, when time came I'd be mad I wasn't there. This is where she'll point she was right). We had been to a Dolly Parton concert a few days before and Angela was hoping to find her biography at Chapters in the West Edmonton Mall. So, there's Ange and I searching out this book, and I realized this was a lost hope, they didn't have Reba's, so they wouldn't have Dolly's.

As I turned around in the aisle and started my way back, the hottest guy was standing right there, and before I could even find words to describe the beauty before me, I grabbed Ange's arm and yanked her around. When I knew she had seen that too, the only thing I could find to say, was "Did you just see that". She responded with the same shock "Uh huh". For the next few minutes we lurked around the book store for another sighting.

Then I ran and told mom "we just saw Jordan Knight".

I don't think she believed me, she figured I was just joking. But when Ange confirmed, we all stood at the entrance discussing what we should do. Ange was just going to leave. Give him his space and privacy, you know, not create a scene. I told her she HAD to at least talk to him and I had my camera in my purse. So, while mom and I stood back, she walked over to the man of her adolescent dreams. She said we were fans, and we'd be at the show, then he asked who she was going with as Mom and I approached. He said "Hi" and I said "I have your doll", he shook my hand and kinda looked at me like I must be on day pass from the group home. Ange continued to interview him like she was back in the days of radio. They talked about whether his family travelled with him and their next stop. His bodyguards came over to him at this point and handed him a Starbucks coffee. He thanked them and then told us to have a great time, and that they always do.

As we turned, we left the store in a euphoric state. Once out of the store we stopped to regroup, and of course grab the cell phone to inform everyone we know of what just happened. He bought Ted Turner's biography, Call Me Ted. All we left with was a youthful dream fulfilled and the angst that we had no proof.

"Why Are You Creating A Blog?" asks Grant

Finally my sister and I have found the public forum for our antics. Sometimes we think the stuff we do and things we say are hilarious. Or at least entertaining. This is a way to share that, and hopefully you will find us funny too.

We initially wanted to have a TV show. We thought Jen might try to be a country singer someday, and I would be her manager. We'd call the show "Pimp My Sister."
Well, that didn't pan out.

And I'm not holding my breath.

So, we're doing this blog instead.

A shout out to Kim and Alexis, bloggers at Project NKOTB. Reading their blog this past week has fed my New Kids addiction and sparked my interest in blogs. And, no doubt alot of what you'll read here, at least from me, will somehow be related to this spectacular boy band.

So, does that answer Grant's question?
I think so.

He told me he'd give me $100 if we put porn up here.
Jordan with his shirt off maybe...
~Ange